[text]

[carcinogenetics]

ATTENTION RESIDENTS OF JIGOKU APTS.
I HAVE HAD IT.
HAD IT UP TO HERE, WHEREVER SUCH A LOFTY BUT UNSTATED PLACE MAY BE ON ONE'S PERSON, WITH MURDEROUS SHIT.
I'M DONE.
FUCKING DONE WITH IT ALL.
DOLLS, GHOSTS, MEATGRUBS, WHATEVER.
I'M THROUGH.
DONE.
DUSTED.
ADIOS, MOTHERFUCKERS.
I REJECT YOUR SHITTY REALITY AND SUBSTITUTE IT FOR ONE OF MY OWN.
I'M SURE YOU'LL FIND IT RICH IN ACCURACY AND CONTENT.
ACCURACY AND CONTENT OF THE ROMANTIC LIVES OF HUMANS, AS LIMITED AS THAT UNDERSTANDING IS IN AND OF ITSELF.
WHAT I AM SAYING, IF NO ONE HAS BEEN ABLE TO GET IT THROUGH THEIR FOOT-THICK CRANIAL PANS, IS THAT I AM GOING TO BE STREAMING SOME ROMCOMS THAT I FOUND AT THE GROCERY STORE.
FUCK YOUR HORROR, FUCK YOUR BULLSHIT, FUCK YOUR SUSPENSE AND JUMPSCARES.
WE ARE GOING TO WATCH THE GREATEST GENRE OF CINEMA TO EVER HAVE GRACED THE SUBJECT OF THE SILVER SCREEN, IN BOTH ALTERNIAN AND EARTHEN CULTURE.
NO GHOSTS.
NO CHILDREN MADE OF MEAT WITH MURDEROUS INTENTIONS.
AND ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING DOLLS.
NONE OF THEM ARE ALLOWED.
NONE.
IF YOU INVITE THEM I WILL EVISCERATE YOU.
I WILL SHOVE YOU IN A ROOM WITH VACANT BEARS AND MOUTHLESS CATS THAT STARE AT YOU WITH DEAD, EMPTY EYES.
WHO KNOWS WHAT HORRORS 'HELLO KITTY' HAS SEEN IN HER LIFE.
WHO KNOWS WHAT TERROR SHE WILL SHARE WITH YOU.
ALL I KNOW IS THAT SHE HAS NO MOUTH AND SHE MUST SCREAM.
SO I'M GOING TO BE STREAMING THESE AT ABOUT SIX THIRTY ON WEDNESDAY ACCORDING TO THE CALENDER ON THIS LUMP OF SHIT THAT PASSES FOR A COMPUTER.
TUNE THE FUCK IN IF YOU DON'T WANT TO JUST LIE DOWN AND LET THE APARTMENTS SHIT ALL OVER YOU.
AND BRING YOUR OWN SNACKS BECAUSE THERE IS NO WAY IN THE SHITTING HELL I AM GOING TO THE GROCERY STORE AGAIN THIS WEEK JUST TO DELIVER SOME MILKY CANDY TO YOUR LAZY ASS DOORS.

Comments

text;

[fraternal]

i'll come by- this is a nice idea, karkat

text;

[carcinogenetics]

BRING FOOD.
ALSO TELL ME ABOUT BRIDGET JONES'S DIARY.
HUMAN MOVIES HAVE REALLY DUMB NAMES.

[fraternal]

i didn't know japanese people were interested in movies like that...
its about a british woman looking for love,
she keeps a diary for a year about it

[carcinogenetics]

WELL THE ONE WHO OWNED THIS LUMP OF FOSSILIZED SHIT BEFORE ME DID - IT'S IN THEIR DOWNLOADS FOLDER.
SHITTY QUALITY, COULD BARELY MAKE OUT ANYTHING THAT WAS HAPPENING.
IT SOUNDS LIKE A MOVIE WE HAVE WITH TROLL RENEE ZELLWEGER THOUGH I GUESS.
ANYWAY NO, THAT ISN'T ONE OF THE MOVIES I'M GOING TO SHOW.
I GUESS THE FIRST ONE IS '100 DAYS WITH MR ARROGANT'?
UGH... WHAT A SHITTY NAME.

text;

[tooled]

[ .. this sure is a lot of colorful language she's never heard of before.. well, some of the cursing she recognizes but some other words.. ]

These "romcoms" are.. viewings of the romantic lives of humans?

text;

[carcinogenetics]

EXPLAINED IN THE SIMPLEST OF TERMS.
OR AT LEAST I ASSUME SO, SINCE HUMAN ROMANCE IS LAUGHABLY SIMPLE TO UNDERSTAND FROM AN OUTSIDER'S PERSPECTIVE.

[tooled]

Perhaps regrettably I have never seen any of these "romcoms" before, but I would like to take the opportunity to see one of them. Would you mind if I took someone else along with me?

[ PEKO IT'S AN OPEN INVITATION STOP BEING FORMAL. ]

[carcinogenetics]

WHATEVER, JUST BRING YOUR OWN FOOD.
AND THERE'S NO 'PERHAPS' ABOUT IT.
THAT IS REGRETTABLE.

[tooled]

Could it be said that you are a fan of those? That would be quite the surprise.

[carcinogenetics]

WHY DOES EVERYONE SAY THAT?!
WHAT'S SO SURPRISING ABOUT A GUY BEING AN EXPERT ON THE MOST COMPLICATED PART OF LIFE?

[tooled]

Forgive me if I am wrong, but your way of typing seems to come off as a little aggressive. Aggression is something generally not involved too many times in romance, is it?

[youlostme]

No way. No, there's definitely no way.

You can't use our apartment to show girls' movies.

[carcinogenetics]

FUCK YOU THESE MOVIES ARE AWESOME.
AND IT WAS MY APARTMENT FIRST SO KINDLY WHISPER ALL YOUR COMPLAINTS INTO YOUR OWN ASSHOLE.

[youlostme]

They might be awesome, but they're for girls. I don't know why we can't watch something with more action instead.

[carcinogenetics]

SURE, ACTION.
LET'S JUST GIVE THE GHOSTS SOME IDEAS DURING ONE OF THOSE MORONIC, ADRENALINE PUMPED YAWNFESTS.
GHOSTS ARE TOO FUCKING STUPID TO GET THE SUBTLE INTRICACIES OF THE ROMANTIC WORLD.
DO YOU KNOW WHY?
BECAUSE THEIR BRAINS ARE DEAD.
THEY ARE DEADBRAINED.
SO THEY CAN'T GET ANY IDEAS FROM ROMCOMS.
ERGO, ROMCOMS ARE THE BEST SO SHUT UP.

[youlostme]

I don't know. I'm not so sure it won't make the ghosts want to fall in love with you. Wouldn't that be bad?

[carcinogenetics]

I KNOW ALL THE WAYS OF DEFLECTING UNWANTED PEOPLE FROM MY QUADRANTS.

[And wanted ones, too.]

THERE'S NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT IN THAT REGARD.

text;

[gatto]

YOU wanna watch those?

text;

[carcinogenetics]

MY GOD.
IT'S TRUE.
YOU HAVE READING COMPREHENSION!
I AM AMAZED.
ONLY NOT BECAUSE SARCASM IS SHITTY.
OF COURSE I WANT TO WATCH THEM.
ROMCOMS ARE AWESOME.

text;

[gatto]

SARCASM? I CAN READ WHAT YOU'RE SAYING JUST FINE.

You don't really seem like the type of guy who'd like them, you know? :)

text;

[carcinogenetics]

AND WHAT EXACTLY WOULD THE TYPE OF GUY WHO WOULD LIKE THEM LOOK LIKE?

text;

[gatto]

NOT LIKE YOU??

I don't really know any guys who like them, I guess.

text;

[carcinogenetics]

IN OTHER WORDS, ONLY KNOW PEOPLE WITH DISMAL TASTE IN CINEMA.

[carneouspuella]

There is no need to be so scared of us, Troll-child. You can't be used for harvest.

[carcinogenetics]

NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOEMNCJSBVJDFV

carcinoGeneticist [CG] has banned Visi from chat.